Rambling Again

Another day. It seems as if each morning brings new challenges, yet new hope as well. Once I managed to get up and get going this morning, work went well. I tried to stay busy in order to 'work' away the gnawing pain. Some days, it works. Some days, it doesn't. I've heard people say it's mind over matter. I guess that's true in a way. All I know is that I have to take one day at a time now.

I'm somewhat angry tonight. Not at any person really, but at this illness that has overtaken my life so mercilessly. I missed my son's high school choral performance tonight. I've cried and apologized, but like the wonderful Christian young man he is, he told me not to worry...there would be more concerts. He told me just to rest and take care of myself. He is very mature for a 16-year-old. I'm so proud of him. He's becoming a man right before my eyes. He's no longer the little boy that climbed in my lap that would read books with me. He's a handsome young man. He makes good grades, he has a beautiful voice, he has an amazing personality and he is also a Volunteer firefighter. I am very proud of him. That's why it angers me that this pain kept me away from something that was so important to him as well as to me. I should have gone anyway, I suppose. But I know how this disease works now --- if I do something when I shouldn't, I pay for it. Usually the next day...a very hard repayment it is.

My daughter will be 13 on Christmas Eve. I can't believe it! My baby is no longer a baby. She's so pretty and very intelligent. She is already about three inches taller than me (I'm 5'2" - lol) so to me she is tall. I was thinking today that she will soon be in high school! Goodness... time flies so quickly! I'm proud of her as well. She would make an excellent actress and has a very outgoing personality. She is my little sweetheart. I hope she keeps that sweetness as she grows up. She and my son both are very tender-hearted...just like their mother. It's a blessing and a curse at times. Being tender-hearted is good when you help others and feel empathy and compassion toward others, but it is a curse when people use that same thing in order to hurt you. It's sad, but it happens.

Well, my pain meds are finally kicking in. I need to try to sleep a while. Tomorrow is a big day at work...New Student Orientations... two of them! I need to be well-rested to handle some of the people I'll get at my desk tomorrow. LOL I honestly wonder how some of them even made it to the parking lot. Sorry - that was mean, but was in fact true.

More soon.

Fibro-girl...out!
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